Me and my ex were classmates and really good friends. But my family & friends always suggested that he shouldn’t be the one, and life would be full of struggle if we end up together. So I was always in a doubt and wanted to change him so that my parents can accept. It took a lot of time to convince my family about him. Since last December, he was really down about his business and family matters, and this idea of getting married was creating an extra pressure on him. Meanwhile my family was emotionally forcing me to go for an arranged marriage.
I feel very conflicted… Do I move on and accept we’re better off apart, or should I try with him? I want what’s best for both of us, but I still have feelings for him. I feel like my entire situation is so messy and I don’t know what to do.
Can a relationship coach help you too?
Rather than focus on the problems you two had, they are fixating on all your good points — which perhaps they lost sight of when you were together. Unfortunately, none of us are perfect and at some point, we also start to see each other’s less favorable traits. One of the best tips to get an ex back is to focus on yourself and be your best self. The more your ex contemplates that they can no longer have you, the more heightened awareness this creates.
Think About What Could Have Happened Differently
Now there are always exceptions depending on the circumstances of the split up and your history together. But you probably left your ex for a good reason and so your focus right now should be on healing and involving yourself in new healthy routines. Remember, your ex boyfriend may still feel quite insecure about talking to you. There will be a part of him that wants to protect his own feelings, avoiding any future disappointment.
Your ex is seen as a possible “backup” if the current relationship fails. Once you know how you feel about your ex, you should have a conversation with your partner. You don’t want to open up a serious talk if you’re not sure where you stand, but as soon as you become sure then it’s only fair to them to bring it up and talk about it. Don’t allow any negative self-talk to infiltrate your beautiful mind. His reasons are his own and have nothing to do with you, regardless of what he says.
No matter how in love with his or her new partner your ex is, remind yourself that they’re not trying to replace you or reproduce what you two had. Each relationship is different because it’s perfectly tailored to the parties involved. Here are six tips that will help you process those lonely wife hookup negative emotions. Brad claims that over 90% of all relationships can be salvaged, and while that may sound unreasonably high, I tend to think he’s on the money. One major problem with exes is that there is usually a lot of unresolved baggage left behind in the relationship.
It is crucial that when you are talking to or spending time with your ex-boyfriend, that you do not get caught up in trying to insult his current girlfriend as this will be a huge turn-off. If you’re the ex in this situation, what does all this mean for you? Outside of trying to improve on your own relationship with your ex, all you can really do is wait and see—but do so patiently. Nagging or otherwise trying to interfere with your ex’s new relationship will likely only remind your ex of the bad times in your former relationship. Remember, you want to look good next to your competition—and good sportsmanship is attractive. If you’ve been following these steps in this guide, they’re more likely to return without being begged to do so.
They’ve stopped analyzing the past and the baggage that comes with it. Instead of pretending to be very happy or helping you out at any chance, they do what they can to ruin your life. They become suddenly unavailable for days when you text about coming by to get your clothes or other items. Their favorite embroidered pillow, a shirt they bought with you that magical day at the beach, the ukelele they tried to learn for a week in the first few months you dated. It could be clothes, souvenirs, even a book you both liked or a favorite hat they always wore.
Post regular updates about your new gym or killer grades. Share flattering selfies, and take group pics with your friends when you go out on the town. If they see that you’re being active, productive, and happy, they’ll be more likely to want you back. No matter how much conflict there was during the breakup ordivorce process, ask yourself if you genuinely want your ex to be unhappy.
They’re probably dating someone new to distract themselves from those complex and upsetting feelings. It’s also possible that they just don’t want to be alone. In any case, don’t assume they just found their soulmate. If you want to get back with your ex, rest assured that you’ve got a shot.